How do I know? You know when you know

Men and women who call themselves “gay” or homosexual are people who feel sexually attracted to others of the same sex, they can even fall in love with others. These feelings emerge when they are still young, and continue for the rest of their lives.

Although some homosexuals are also attracted to the opposite sex, they often feel that their attraction to the same sex is stronger and more important. Some experts estimate that about one in ten people in the world are gay or lesbian (lesbian is the term applied to women who feel sexually attracted to other women). This means that in a large group of people there are usually gays and lesbians present.

However, nobody can say who is gay or lesbian unless they want the world to know. Homosexuals or gay people generally feel good around other people, but they usually feel different about other people. For gay youth it is difficult to define why they feel different, especially when they realize that the rest of their companions at school are attracted to women. Therefore, young homosexuals do not always feel that they “fit” into the group, and often do not feel comfortable talking about it with adults.

How do I know if I’m gay?

You may not feel able to name your feelings. And that’s fine because you do not need to rush to put a “tag” on you. Sexual identity develops over time.

Many young teenagers are sexually active around puberty (usually between the ages of 11 and 15), when the body begins to change and the hormones to flow. The feelings of sexual order that you may experience during this stage may be so strong that they may not necessarily be directed towards people or situations but rather emerge without cause. As you mature, you will realize that it is what attracts you. Adolescents who have really gay feelings find that, over time, these feelings towards other men are more and more defined. It may be that you fall in love with one of your companions at school or develop a great attraction towards some grown man.

As you mature, you will realize that it is what attracts you. Adolescents who have really gay feelings find that, over time, these feelings towards other men are more and more defined. It may be that you fall in love with one of your companions at school or develop a great attraction towards some grown man.

It may be that these experiences cause you pleasure or confusion, or a mixture of the two. By the age of 16 or 17, many gay teens are beginning to think about how to identify themselves sexually, while others require more time. They may thing:

  • When I sleep or have sexual fantasies, is it with men or with women?
  • Have I been in love or strongly attracted to another boy or adult man?
  • Do I feel different about other men?
  • How are my feelings toward other adolescent or adult men, confused or defined?

Am I normal?

Yes, you are absolutely normal. Many men are gay. Do you want to know more? Start by looking for books on the subject. Qsk the person in charge at your school library or your locality to direct you to the books section dedicated to young adults. People who work in libraries are not only there to help but are also governed by a fairly strict ethical code, and are legally bound to protect the privacy of library users, including minors.

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